It feels like it’s been a long time since I’ve posted on here. Easter weekend is upon us, and whether you celebrate or not it’s a chance to use these days off to re-calibrate where you’re at right now. As the weeks go further and further, I’m at that point where I do have to look ahead as to whether I should continue. So far no responses to the jobs I applied for except one; denied for missing something in my application? Pretty sure I had that, and qualified but I won’t pursue it. This Monday is the second, and most major, test in this class. It’s not the end if I do bad on it, as there is a make-up exam at the end. But doing bad will definitely hit the confidence and self-esteem. I look around at my classmates, and others who are chasing the same thing, and I can’t help but notice how. . . “perfectionist” they can be? I can overhear a few wanting a study group, but must be exclusive about who to invite; and I’m sure they asked the A-students. Others, besides wanting the very good grades, also want to pad their resume with activities they do.
I get it. . . it’s a competition to get there. But honestly, like many other things in society, it’s not a perfect measurement of who can do the task. I’ve read forums online how some people get in with a few C’s while perhaps doing great things on the side, and not all schools look for the same thing. Some may go for the perfect A, great MCAT and resume, while others are a little more lenient. Along the way though, I know some gifted people get passed over around the world. Some are good at chemistry, while others are better at biology. Some can write great papers in english, while excel in speech class. Time is so short to be forever in school, or paying for it, and it sucks to think because maybe you couldn’t get the perfect grade in a certain class, you’re deemed not ready for this career. I’ll admit, I think many of my grades are in the B-B+ range that they will look at, but I was 18-21 and different. Other things go on in our lives, and who teaches you is just as important. But med schools won’t really care for that. Yet the truth is, we all learn in different styles. Some can learn how to kick a ball from a book, but others are better actually doing it.
I can’t help but think of one of my favorite movies, Patch Adams, which motivated me when I was little to think about this path. Though I can’t stay in school till I’m in my 40’s, I relate to how he is in regards to classmates. Everyone is so hyper-focused about grades and looking good. . . we forget the human-side to things. At the end of the day, you don’t want a doctor who tells you how he got top of his class and knows what he’s doing. People would rather have the one who actually listens, and treats the person and not just the disease. The clock is almost at twelve, and I may not post in awhile as the heavy part of the semester rolls in. It’s not the end of the road yet, but coming up is supposed to show if I’m ready or not. I know I’m ready, but will med schools think so just cause I wasn’t valedictorian and partook in 15 different organizations?