So today I’m in “sleepwalk” mode, because I’m on about 3 hours sleep. I went to bed at midnight, only to wake up at 3:00am. Toss and turn, toss and turn, check the clock again, about two more hours passed. It was one of those nights, and I’m not sure why it happened. When I awoke, my mind was thinking about movie actors which I guess I was dreaming about. But I wouldn’t be surprised if there’s something else on my mind, I just don’t know what; or maybe I’m too tired to realize. Anyway for most of the day, I will be hoping it’s not busy while I try to appear like I’m fully functional. But that’s not the point of why I’m posting this. Last night I watched a new show that debuted called: a million little things.
It is a drama about a group of friends who thought they were close, until one of their own commits suicide. Navigating through that, along with their own personal ordeals will be interesting to see play out this season. I’m not getting my hopes up, because so many shows I enjoyed watching never survive long; maybe a season or two. But seeing those group of friends, and their issues, really connected with me and my friends. As much as I wish we were there everyday in our lives, like most sitcoms have you believe, we are lucky if we see each other once a week; for others once a month or longer. As we get older, life is so strange in how it impacts our relationships with others. People come and go, and people we wouldn’t normally surround ourselves with at one point in time suddenly are like family in another time. We drift or get close to certain extents, but we try to do our best. Mainly, we find kindred spirits in some way to us, as we go on this crazy adventure.
It just made me appreciate those I do have in my life, and that I should let them know that more often. We sometimes talk heavy subject matter, but more often than not we tend to tackle them on by ourselves. Yet we do know we’re there for each other when needed, as I’m sure you and your friends say the same thing. Because whether it’s for a year or over a decade, we grow older with these people. We see them achieve accomplishments, make mistakes, and they see us go through our own triumphs and falls. We can be as funny, weird, serious as we want with them and they (for the most part) get us and relate. We develop that special bond and trust that not many people will earn. But there may be moments where we can’t be there for them when they might need a shoulder to lean on. Maybe they went through a break-up or divorce, or got relocated for a new job, or are thinking suicidal thoughts. And perhaps we are too busy to respond to them, or got caught up with work or our own personal issues. Maybe we didn’t know how to handle them in this moment, or know what to say to them.
These are the ones we create moments to remember and re-tell when we are older. The ones you hope to see around the holidays, and watch as we develop our own families; whether it be kids, pets or other friends. But in can be tough to see the ones we care about going through difficulties. The best we truly can do is simply be there for them though, even if it’s just sitting next to them and not saying a single word. Watching this show made me think back to when I had serious depression as a teen, and none of my friends knew about it. Or how some of my friends recently went through their own bouts of sadness, anger, or depression. The common thing here is that we didn’t say anything about it until much time had passed. Sometimes it’s turns out okay, while other times it can lead to a more dangerous road that we may regret. If you ever related to this, or feel like it’s happening now, don’t hesitate to talk about it with your friends and others. It’s better to have someone there, rather than going at it alone or trying to sweep it under the rug.
Whether it be depression, suicidal thoughts, having an affair, battling cancer, or whatever else it may be. . . talk to someone. It is not easy to have such talks, but it takes more strength to open up about it then it is trying to hold it all within. It’s okay to say “I’m not doing well”, even when others see you as a model of strong will and positivity. While I plan to continue to watch this show, I hope to be a better friend not just to my close friends but also in general. Like I said way back in my early posts, there’s a whole world outside of our town/state, with so many people who could be an amazing friend. It’s all about fate and chance. Following your destiny to where you are supposed to be, and taking the chance on the people who are there. Because if we open up and strike conversation, we more often than not run into very interesting people who impact our life as we might impact theirs. But it all starts with the key word: communication.
In my case, I see so many names and some faces on the street, on here or on Tandem. I can see where you come from, but I don’t really know you. Even my international friends I could try to be a better friend to; instead of being monthly pen pals with. Though the time difference, and less presence in their daily life, certainly play more of an impact; though at times it feels like just a matter of drifting apart. And that’s a part of life and the cycle with some friends. It can be very hard to maintain the ones made long ago as we grow up. Sometimes we move, other times our interests and values change. No matter what, we try to fondly remember the good times had with them as we embark on a new road where we run into new faces. Take a look at your friends around you, and just think how you got to this moment with them and the life you had before running into them. When you take a step back and look at it all, and who you have walking with you on this journey, it feels surreal.
From the moment you first met, to all the adventures had up until now, it’s special when you find a good friend. All the little things that build up over time that weave the story between us all. The good, the bad, the sad, the joyful, the memorable. Watching this show made me realize, again, that we should truly appreciate the ones we have because it is not easy to find others who get us. When we do, enjoy the times spent, because life is crazy and we don’t know where it will lead us or them. All we can do is be there by their side as best we can, like they are with us, and let them know we are there for them to talk to about anything. Whether it’s good word or bad, be supportive of your friends but don’t be afraid to speak up as well. It can make a difference. Regardless of age, race, religion, etc. we are able to, at first, find one little thing about someone that we connect with. And then a million little things later, we realize what amazing, close friends we have by our side. . . cherish that.