I remember meeting him quite a while ago
I didn’t expect how things would go upon meeting
We just talked about life and travels at first
But soon there was attraction involved in our chats
A part of me tried to pull away calling it crazy
While another part of me wanted to explore it
I would later consider it to be a weird experience
If only I could take back those words I said to him
The whole ride together was actually normal for you
Because you had seen such similar stories nearby
From families to friends to even clients you saw
You truly believed in trying something at least once
Though curious I was there were still walls put up
And you did your best to tear those back down
But for every attempt to be caring and romantic
A new barrier would slowly be constructed there
If only I had built stronger bonds with you instead
The truth was that I was afraid of taking the leap
Despite your compassion to take things slowly
Everything still felt like it was in a rush in my mind
I wanted to dream of a future with you but wouldn’t
The excitement was suppressed which brought pain
With you it was as if we were worlds apart talking
And I didn’t want that rather I wanted you right here
If only I had taken that chance and waited it out
But my heart couldn’t bear the internal suffering
So one day I dropped the unexpected news on you
I wished you the best as I said my goodbye and left
Knowing it’d take me another while to move forward
And knowing I had to burn bridges with you to do so
I simply couldn’t handle it like you could so well
How could one be that patient for something like this
If only I had that optimism and belief as you did
Weeks turned to months since we went our own ways
I’ve even tried moving on to someone new here
But time and time again they just weren’t the same
That feeling and connection just wasn’t as strong
I tried to force myself to like them but simply couldn’t
And I wasn’t going to be like some friends and just settle
You showed me that life’s too short to be content with ‘ok’
If only I believed in making the most of this one life
Eventually I reached a point where I felt healed and good
But while I was doing well in my ventures on my own
A side of me longed for a partner to be by my side
To go on many travels and dating adventures together
Meeting each other’s friends and families eventually
Those were some of the things that you talked about
They were what I chose to ignore to hear at the time
But after over a year I thought to listen to your voice again
If only I had reached out to you much sooner than I did
After so long I decided to find you and see how you are
Maybe get some closure of our past and talk of the future
It took awhile but I was actually able to locate you again
Wondering where you are led me to you in a church
I found out and heard that you were getting married
A part of me was quite disappointed while the other glad
I was happy you were finally able to find someone
Who took a leap of faith with you and didn’t build walls
She was beautiful and seemed to light up a whole room
Something that you craved for along with wanderlust
You’re well on your way to achieving the dreams you had
Finding someone, having a child and building a family
Having a busy house, a fun career and loving memories
While you experience all these things I hope you think of me
Not in the way others might think but of what we had
I would never ask you to leave her or your future family
What I hope is you don’t forget the memories that led you here
Our experiences as one through all of the ups and downs
The things we did together and the ones I couldn’t do with you
Because all of those things have brought you to this happiness
One that you so deserved for a very long time to be honest
Something that I have yet to find and keep wondering about
I’m sure we’re both grateful for what we had which I miss
The things I once was afraid of I’d love a second chance at
But now that they are gone I at least got a closure to this
Someday I may find it myself or maybe I won’t in the end
All I know is you were so right for me and I let you go
If only I had stayed and didn’t let the chance of us slip away. . .
Novatourist 